Return of the Dreamscape
by Irishlass18
Summary: Tucker wasn't asked if he wanted an afterlife and he wouldn't have asked for one with this unbalanced woman that has the power to save or destroy his last semblances of sanity.Now he must choose to accept her or die,not yet fully realizing that her life depends just as much on him as his does on her.With her and through her he must face a new n hope or love truly survive?
1. He's Gone and yet not

_For those of you who read my other story "The Dream" you will be familiar with one original character, Aisling, and her culture and powers. If you haven't read "The Dream" I suggest that you do but you don't have to before you read this. Just so you know I only own Aisling, Jenna, and this idea, all else is Roddenberry territory. Enjoy!_

* * *

Oh this was the life! Malcolm stretched his back as he lay on his stomach, basking in the quiet sunlight. There were no worries here, no time constraints or missions. He could completely let down his guard, open up completely, and just be himself. He had no one to impress, no one to follow orders from. It was just him and-

"Guess what?"

Malcolm rolled over to look at his beautiful companion, whose long arms and legs were splayed across the sand, "What?"

"I heard from Jenna." She smiled at him before continuing. "She's just as talkative and random as ever."

Malcolm raised his eyebrows, "How? I didn't know that you could still communicate with her now that you're technically inside me."

"Well," Aisling smiled, "I was unaware of that ability as well but apparently since we're still on the Enterprise and that was where the dreamscape was originally created, Jenna just tracked down the Enterprise in her own dreamscape and contacted me through the traces of my dreamscape."

"Traces of your dreamscape?" Malcolm frowned for a moment, "What does that mean exactly?"

Aisling smiled as she idly traced her fingertips across Malcolm's chest, "Any time one of my people creates a dreamscape there will always be a part of that dreamscape in existence, even after the creator leaves it behind. It's like cutting a hole in a piece of paper I suppose. Even if you put the cut out piece back in the hole, the hole is still there, just not as readily seen or accessed." She shrugged, her movements causing her shoulders to dig deeper into the warm sand beneath them. "A lot of our powers are difficult even for us to explain to one another so we've come to just accept them as fact."

"Well I don't suppose the people back on your home planet have a lot of outside visitors." Malcolm remembered the fact that her planet could travel like a starship and even had an artificial sun that traveled with it. "Unless they happen to find your world and are granted access, which if I remember correctly they aren't very often."

Aisling smiled, "Since the wars have ended and the instigating generals have been caught and disciplined the world has calmed down considerably and visitors are allowed now. At least that's what Jenna told me this morning." Aisling stretched her body, her long limbs tightening then slowly relaxing once more, the purple dots on her neck darkening then lightening again. "She said she was going to stick around until after the birth."

Malcolm smiled down at Aisling's swollen belly, the reminder making him go all warm and fuzzy inside. She was due in about a week or so, if they'd counted the months and weeks correctly, and he was already acting like a proud father rooster, his feathers spread and his chest thrust out.

In the years since they met, Malcolm had managed to tell Trip, Phlox, and the captain about Aisling and her dreamscapes. Of course at first they'd all doubted his sanity but then Aisling had managed to project herself into the real Enterprise and appear to the others. Of course even then Trip still had his reservations and the captain only smiled and nodded.

Since that time Malcolm had been able to keep them up to date on their relationship, though he didn't often open up about it. The crew did know that he was expecting a child, though they believed his girl and mother-to-be were back on Earth, and Phlox had already given him lessons on how to deliver a baby as well as a crash course in parenting. Malcolm found himself cornered by crew members he didn't often associate with, all wanting to offer him parenting advice.

"Well that's great." Malcolm smiled, one of his hands resting on her belly. "Has she gotten her own body yet or is she still in that man's?"

Aisling giggled, "They made a trip back to our home world and while there they found a comatose body that had been without a consciousness for a few months. She gave her friend his body back and went into the new one. She came by herself in a single ship, so he is still back on the home world with his family." She giggled again. "Jenna told me he nearly danced a jig once he had his body to himself again but then nearly cried when she left to come here. I guess he was so used to having her inside him that the thought of her without him was odd and upsetting."

"I'm sure it was like loosing a personality complex." Aisling tsked at him and he only smiled. "Will she be present at the birth or will you have to go back into the original dreamscape for her to see?" Malcolm was still confused over her powers even after all this time together.

Aisling tipped her head to the side as she pondered his question, "I honestly don't know. I mean she has the ability to create a dreamscape in your mind but with my presence already here I don't know if that will affect it or not."

Malcolm nodded, stretching his body as well. They had at least thirty more minutes before he woke up in the Enterprise again. She'd wanted to go to the tropics lately so before he'd fallen asleep he'd made sure to think of one of the beaches in the Virgin Islands that he'd enjoyed years ago on shore leave. So here they were lounging naked on a deserted beach in a deserted world with all the privacy they could possibly want.

"Are you worried about the birth?" Malcolm looked over to Aisling once he finished his stretch.

She smiled, "Not really. You're here, Phlox gave you instructions, and I know some as well from my own research. There's not a lot to worry about. I suppose my only worry would be Jenna shooting to the moon in her excitement."

"Yes I remember she is quite energetic."

Aisling snorted, "To say the least. Her mother, my late sister, was one of the happiest most energetic people I know. Somehow, Jenna surpasses her in her ability to ramble though. It's quite a feat, let me tell you."

Malcolm chuckled, turning on his side and draping his arm across her, holding her close to his chest. She sighed as she turned to face him, her belly pressing into his. He smiled and she giggled at the contact but neither said anything. They contentedly lay there, soaking up the sun and each others presence. Malcolm was very happy just to lay there for hours.

The ship had just rescued Shran's daughter from some of his "associates" and now it was heading back to earth for the charter to be signed. The captain was nervous about his speech; even without talking to him Malcolm knew that as fact. Trip was a bit put out about leaving all his friends, probably especially T'Pol. Malcolm had to admit as well that it was going to be a bit rough changing from the Enterprise to his next duty. It'd taken him this long to get used to everyone and finally "open" up to some of them, namely Trip, but still that counted.

"Are you worried about the charter?"

Aisling's voice brought him out of his idle thoughts. He thought for a moment, honestly searching himself, before shaking his head.

"I only feel a little odd about separating from a crew I've grown accustomed to." He smiled slightly. "I only just recently allowed myself to actually open up with Trip."

Aisling nodded, "I understand, Mal, and it's normal. You're moving on to a completely new part of your life, both in reality and here." She smiled down at her belly before looking back up at him. "You can at least take comfort in the knowledge that Trip will always keep in contact, whether you want him to or not," Malcolm smiled and chuckled at the truth in her words, "and I'm always here as well. So you're never going to be alone."

"Oh I know that and that wasn't what bothered me about leaving the Enterprise," he sighed, "I suppose I've gotten attached to it."

Aisling giggled, "Maybe my hormones have rubbed off on you and you're turning into a simpering female."

Malcolm poked her in the side and she giggled. He knew not to press too hard, since she did bruise VERY easily, but he still continued to poke her until she was near crying from giggling so hard. When she sobered, once he stopped, she wiped the tears from her eyes and smiled at him.

"You ready to wake up now?"

Malcolm sighed, "I suppose I must."

Aisling kissed him softly and gave him a tight hug before she rolled away and Malcolm woke up in his bed, alone. He swore he could still smell lavender, her smell, on his hands from where he held her. He smiled as he stood and got ready for the day. It was always easier to face the day when he knew he was going to see Aisling again that night.

The day started out perfectly fine but then hell broke out and it ended in death. Shran's associates had tracked them down and boarded. They'd demanded to be taken to Shran and the captain had refused. Trip, being the hero that he always had to be, said he'd take them. He'd duped them though, and blown them up, himself included. He'd been critically wounded and now Phlox worked desperately over him, trying to save his life.

Malcolm stayed at his post while he knew his friend lay dying in sickbay. He reached for Aisling in desperation. Over the years they'd managed to develop a direct link between the two realities and could now directly communicate.

"_What is it Malcolm? Why are you so distressed?"_

Malcolm showed Aisling his memories and he heard her gasp and knew she had tears in her eyes. She felt the same feelings he had, experienced the same sensations he did, and because of such she had similar friendly attachments as he did.

"_Is there anything you can do Aisling?"_

Malcolm knew he was desperate to ask his wife this question. He usually just accepted her powers, as she did, and didn't ask to push them or have her display them. But now, with his best friend near death, he wondered if maybe there was a power she hadn't revealed to him.

"_I cannot heal him without transferring myself into him. I can't transfer into him because I'd loose the baby, since his body is not compatible with the pregnancy. And yours is only because the baby is yours." Aisling sighed. "The best I can do is steal his consciousness before he dies and place it within the dreamscape I left behind."_

Malcolm sat up straighter, his mind completely alert. So in a way, she could save him.

"_I could save his consciousness and place it within my old dreamscape. However, that would mean he would forever be stuck there. Besides me and you via me, he would be isolated from everything and everyone he once knew. He'd live out the rest of eternity on board the Enterprise, alone. Do you want to do that to him?"_

Malcolm frowned and clenched his hands into fists. The thought of loosing Trip nearly cut his heart in two. He hadn't realized he'd appreciated the engineer's friendship so much until now, when he was threatened with the possibility of loosing him forever. However, it would be terribly selfish of him to ask Aisling to save Trip from complete death only to condemn him to isolation. For a social creature like Trip, that would be a fate worse than death. He sighed and shook his head, his body slouching for a moment. Then he remembered Jenna.

"_Yes she is in my old dreamscape, but what does she have to do with this?"_

Malcolm smiled. Maybe if her sister could come into Aisling's old dreamscape others of their kind could as well. Maybe Jenna could make friends with him and somehow take Trip back to their home world and get him a new body, of sorts. Or maybe even take him into her own body. Aisling was silent for a few agonizingly long minutes after his projected thoughts and in that time frame Malcolm felt his heart skip at least a half a dozen beats.

"_I think that's possible. However, both Trip and Jenna would have to agree to this. If I transfer him into the dreamscape and he doesn't want to go with her, or become a part of her, or doesn't want to live even in that way, then Jenna would have to 'kill' him. He can't do it on his own, since he lacks our powers."_

Malcolm sighed and finally relaxed a bit, though he refused to slouch in his chair again. He knew Trip would probably not like the situation completely, but as long as Trip was alive and well somewhere in someway, Malcolm was happy. This whole idea was selfish and immature; he was smart enough to admit that, however it was also Trip's only hope. Trip didn't deserve to die young, no one did, but especially not Trip. Malcolm nodded his head and prayed that Aisling was successful.

Aisling was quiet again but Malcolm felt her caress him, her scent lingering in his nostrils as if she'd just walked by.

"_I'll let you know when all is done."_

Just then the captain came onto the bridge, his face haggard and tired. Hoshi stood and T'Pol looked up from her station. Malcolm knew without the captain having to speak what had happened.

"Trip's-" the captain's voice broke and he had to pause before continuing, "Tucker is dead."

Hoshi started to cry, T'Pol looked back to her station, Mayweather concentrated on his controls though Malcolm noticed his jaw quiver slightly. Malcolm felt sick in his stomach but he reached for Aisling. When he felt her reassurance he relaxed a bit. However he was still full of grief because the friend he'd grown to love as a brother was dead to him in this reality and would soon only become a dream like his own Aisling.

That night, after all the debris had been cleared away and Trip's body cared for, Malcolm went back to his quarters and sat on his bed, not even bothering with the light. He reminisced over his years with Trip, remembering all the frustrations and funny times. He continued this bittersweet nostalgia as he got undressed for bed. He was sure the rest of the crew was doing the same thing. Remembering how Trip had affected their lives and so on. He knew everyone was evaluating their past relationship with the late engineer and wondering what could've been different if he hadn't died.

Malcolm sighed as he crawled into bed and lay on his back. He, for one, knew that his life had been enriched by the outgoing, fun loving, mischief making engineer. He also knew that even if he was gone from this reality, knowing that his "essence" was alive somewhere made coping with the grief of his passing that much easier.

Malcolm was right, in assuming that everyone was evaluating their relationships with Trip. Archer stared at his picture and pondered what he'd write to Trip's family; Hoshi cried bittersweet tears as she watched one of Trip's favorite movies; Mayweather kept himself from crying as he ate apple pie; T'Pol tried to meditate but kept remembering different qualities about Trip that had always tempted her to smile. Trip had affected all of them in subtle yet strong ways. Now that he was gone, it was like a light was turned out, and the Enterprise was no longer whole.

* * *

_Please let me know what you think!_


	2. Waking in Dreamscape

_I own Jenna and Aisling, and the idea of this, but nada else…duh! ^__^_

* * *

The first thing he was aware of was the silence; the second, the fact that he wasn't dead. His heart was still racing, his breath still making his chest rise and fall. He flexed his muscles then relaxed, realizing that all his appendages were still intact. Next, he slowly opened his eyes and blinked his surroundings into focus.

"What the hell?" Trip slowly sat up and gazed around him at the interior of the Enterprise, not blown up.

He was in the exact same spot he'd been in when he'd tricked those damn aliens into death, however instead of there being dead bodies and a destroyed area of the ship surrounding him; it looked as good as new. In fact, there was no one around him, and from the sounds of things, there appeared to be no one around.

Trip stood and quickly jogged down the corridor towards the turbo lift. As he moved he peered down the off-branching corridors. All the way to the turbolift, he saw no one, heard no one. His heart started to race faster in apprehension as he entered the turbolift and instructed it to take him to the bridge. While he waited he tried to contact fellow crew members but no one answered. When he emerged on the bridge of the ship, there was no one.

"What-" he stood by Archer's chair gazing out the view screen to a blanket of black space with white stars.

After the initial moment of shock he moved to his station and double checked every reading. He moved over to Malcolm's station and checked out his readings as well. He even tried out Mayweather's and Hoshi's stations. Everything appeared normal, which it shouldn't. Again he tried contacting individual crew members then gave up and tried the ship-wide com system.

"Is anyone here?" He paused as he sat down at his station, his head resting in his hands, "If anyone is here please come to the bridge. This is Trip." He cut off the com and leaned back in his chair to wait, desperate hope mixing with his surging confusion.

He didn't know how much time passed but when the turbolift slid open he surged to his feet so quickly he knocked his knee on the corner of his station. He reached down and rubbed the offended knee before he looked up to see which other crew member had been placed in this odd reality with him.

"Who-" Trip slowly stood up straight again, his eyes widening and his mouth dropping open.

Instead of any familiar crewmember standing there, there stood a strange looking female. In height, her blue-eyed face probably reached his shoulders, in build she was average though she appeared to have a little extra hugging her very curvy body. This wasn't what made her different from any other human females he'd seen. No what was odd, or different, about her was her waist length blue hair and what looked like blue tattoos in odd curving and knot designs that began at the top of her forehead, where her hair began, traveled down the middle of her face, down the middle of her neck, and disappeared beneath the tight fitting tank top she wore. The tattoo didn't stop there though; it appeared again at the tip of her middle finger on both hands and traveled up the middle of her arms to her neck where it came across her shoulders and around to meet the line down her neck. Trip couldn't help but wonder if it traveled else where as well, but now wasn't the time for that.

"That was my question exactly." Her voice was melodic and he knew immediately that she could sing, if she wanted to at least.

Trip tipped his head to the side, "Huh?"

"You said 'who' and I was wondering the same thing about you. Who are you and how did you get here?"

Trip shook his head, "I have no idea how I got here but I'm the engineer of this ship. Commander Charles Tucker."

The woman looked intrigued, her surprise and confusion somehow melting away with his words. Apparently she knew more about the situation and this place than he did.

"I'm Jenna," she tipped her head to the side with an amused smile on her face, "I was a captain of a ship but I 'retired' of sorts to come visit my aunt while she gives birth to her first child." She grinned then, "I believe you know the father, his name is Malcolm Reed, I think he's a lieutenant on this ship."

Trip's mouth dropped, "You mean his 'dreams' about an alternate Enterprise and that woman in his dream were true?"

"Yup," Jenna smiled as she crossed her arms across her chest, "and I believe Malcolm asked Aisling to transport you into her old dreamscape, though why I'm still in the dark about."

"Dreamscape?" Trip scratched his head in confusion. "What's that?"

Jenna sighed and shook her head, "It's going to take a hell of a long time to explain. I was just about to eat dinner when I jumped out of my skin at your voice. I'm so used to being alone here that when I heard your voice…well needless to say I don't think I've jumped that high when surprised." She chuckled and made the turbolift open again, "I can explain everything I know to you over food. I'm hungry, I'm sure you probably are more hungry than you realize, and it's much easier to talk over food than standing across a bridge staring at each other."

Trip nodded and dumbly followed her into the lift. Once in the enclosed space he became acutely aware of a strong scent of roses. He sniffed the air a few times then turned and looked at her more closely. She appeared aware of his questioning look without even turning to look directly at him. She smiled and nodded.

"It's me. All females from my planet have a distinct scent that goes with them no matter what body they go into."

Trip looked a bit uncomfortable, "No matter what BODY they go into? What the hell does that mean?"

"Sorry," she blushed a bit, "I'll explain that over dinner as well. But I didn't want you thinking I spiffed up at the thought of having you suddenly aboard," she chuckled and shot him an amused look, "I smell great naturally."

She walked in front of him towards the mess hall and he noticed that the tattoos continued down the backs of her legs, he could see this as she wore shorts, and for some reason he got the feeling that the tattoo probably continued up her back as well. He again wondered at the significance of these tattoos but figured he'd just ask later. He figured he'd ask a lot of things later. First thing was first: find out what the hell was going on and how was he going to back to reality.

He got some apple pie and a glass of milk, figuring the "staple" foods of his childhood would help keep him calm in the midst of this craziness. He watched in fascination as she loaded up two plates full of various items: mashed potatoes, meatloaf, mac 'n cheese, green beans, corn bread, corn, and other items he didn't quite recognize but figured were edible. She went back for desserts once she had her regular food placed on a table, and then she went back for an assortment of drinks as well. Once she was seated, with her feast before her, he could only stare at her in wonderment. When she looked up and saw his look she smiled.

"What?"

Trip gazed from the food up to her then back to the food again, "You sure you can eat all that?"

"Oh yes I can! I adore food! I haven't had my own body in a number of…years actually, so to finally be able to eat with my own mouth and taste it with my own senses…oh it's grand!" She purred and Trip raised his eyebrows at her ability to actually sound like a cat when she did so. "Anyway, I'm sure you didn't want to ask about my appetite now were you?" She winked at him before she turned her attention back to her food.

Trip seized on his opportunity and leaned forward, "Yes, my first question is, who are you, aside from your name?"

"I am a…well I don't think there could be a way to translate the name of my race into your tongue so I'll just say I'm a dreamscaper. That makes me sound rather like a super hero or something." She tipped her head for a moment then shrugged. "Anyway, I have the ability to create and live inside dreams, making a sort of alternate reality for myself, a dreamscape if you will. The environment of the dream world has to be similar to my own in regards to life support and breathable air, and it has to be able to be stable enough support my life force until such a time that I can transfer back into a body once again. So in a way, I suppose, you could call this a really good 'trip.'" She grinned. "Have you ever had one?"

Trip looked confused, "A 'one' what?"

"A good trip? You know a drug induced hallucination?"

"How did we go from who and what you are to hallucinations?" Trip scratched his head; it was difficult to keep up with her.

Jenna smiled and waved off his question, "If you haven't noticed I tend to ramble. If I confuse you too much just hold up your hand for a time-out and I'll reiterate myself." She took a deep breath then let it out slowly. "Anyway, back to who and what I am. My people can transfer ourselves, which is our consciousnesses, into other bodies. So let's say my body is seriously injured and I'm about to die, I have two choices. I can transfer myself into a nearby body and take it over, or just co-exist with the host in it already, or I can create a dreamscape to escape to and chill out in until a new body without a host can be found."

"Take a body over? You have that ability?" He squirmed in his seat, seriously uncomfortable sitting across from her now.

Jenna nodded, "Most on my planet are not willing to push out another's consciousness, but there were some who did and would. Thankfully people of that mindset were caught and disciplined and my planet is again in peace. However, because of our abilities, we tend to keep silent about them, knowing that it would probably scare the hell out of any possible trade alliance if they knew we could beat the shit out of them, from the inside out."

"Yah that would put a negative light on things." Trip again leaned forward, a bit more comfortable knowing that mostly her race wasn't willing to violently take over a body. "What quadrant are your people from?"

Jenna chuckled, "Well my planet can travel like space ships, and we even have an orbiting sun that goes with us everywhere." Trip looked astonished and she eagerly nodded. "We've adopted the technology of races I'm sure your people haven't even met before. We have a variety of races that live on the planet with us, though the minds are originally from the planet. We have some people over three thousand years old on the planet!" She shook her head. "Listening to them is like listening to an encyclopedia!"

"I'm sure," Trip raked a hand over his face before he propped his elbows up on the table and leaned into them, "Now for the next question."

Jenna leaned forward as well, "I'm all ears, though not physically."

"Why am I here?" He asked his question as if she hadn't interrupted him.

Jenna leaned back, took a long sip of one of her drinks and sighed, "That my friend, is a question I cannot answer."

* * *

_I know this is short, but I'm working nights and am quite tired._


	3. Kama Sutra anyone?

_I own Aisling, Jenna, this idea, their race, but nada else. Hope you've liked so far, be sure and let me know. Do you have any particular requests for embarrassing situations to put Trip through? I adore "torturing" my characters._

* * *

Trip looked ready to gag, "What do you mean you can't answer that?"

Jenna sighed and shook her head, what the hell had her aunt gotten her into anyway? Here she was, happily biding her time on this interesting ship waiting for her aunt to pop—meaning have her baby—and then here comes this sexy as all get-out engineer, scaring the hell out of her, and tempting her nearly as much. When was the last time she'd been with someone, as herself and not sharing with someone else's mind? Jenna had to squint in thought actually. It had been a LONG time. Of course, she couldn't very well ask this guy to end her less than willing years of celibacy; he was too busy trying to stay sane in the midst of all this oddness. She couldn't blame him though. The thought of getting stuck with her had driven many a man crazy, much to her amusement.

"Well my aunt, Aisling, didn't exactly inform me of your coming presence nor did she tell me why she was bringing you here, so when I say I can't answer I'm serious. I can guesstimate, but I don't think you want me to do that."

Trip looked sketchy, "Why wouldn't I want you to do that?"

"Because," she sighed, "I tend to assume the worst in things. Having two bodies killed on me and constantly having to jump from body to body in my efforts to find all the instigators of the violent war that just recently ended on my planet, well, that kinda warped my mind into thinking that 'all hell' really does break loose."

What did this guy want from her? A signed, sealed, and delivered note of death? She knew, already, that was the only way her aunt would've transported anyone into this dreamscape with her. Her aunt was more of a paranoid freak than she was, so the likelihood of her just nillywilly taking someone's consciousness and throwing it in here was very small. There had to have been no other choice, desperation had to have been involved, and desperation that involved a dreamscape usually only involved death. Was she about to tell him this? Hell no! She didn't think she could handle hyperventilating, sanity-loosing sexiness.

"Then what do you assume has happened in my case?" He persisted and she inwardly groaned.

Jenna stalled by downing the rest of what was called Andorian ale and slowly breathed in and out as it burned its way to her belly. Boy that pain felt good! No, she wasn't "odd" that way, but after so many years of not feeling her own physical pain, a little pain felt darn good from time to time.

Jenna scratched her forehead and sighed, "I assume you've been hurt in some way and Malcolm, seeing you in such pain, asked Aisling to transport you here, into her old dreamscape."

Trip didn't look like he was following completely, and she didn't blame him. "Her old dreamscape?" He looked around then back to her. "Where is she then? And where is Malcolm at that?"

Jenna pinched the bridge of her nose, "She transferred her consciousness inside Malcolm, so she is inside him all the time but they interact at night, through 'dreams.' That's how she's gotten pregnant and such. The dreams are her reality, and a form of his. This," she waved her arms around her, "is where they first met and anytime a dreamscape is created traces of it will be left behind. She apparently decided to put you inside her old one until you got better or-" she quickly coughed and took a drink of something called coffee.

Trip seized upon her words, "Or what?"

"Huh?"

"You said 'or' or what?"

Jenna did a good job of looking dumb as she tapped her chin, "I don't know what I was about to say. My mind races around a lot."

Trip sighed heavily as he threw his arms up and leaned back in his chair. Jenna felt sorry for the guy. She couldn't completely bring herself to be mad at Aisling for bringing him here. He was rather nice to look at, his accent was warm, and she was sure when he wasn't stressed out he was probably fun to hang out with. From the looks of it, he had nice hands, great lips, wonderful eyes, and arms that looked quite huggable. All in all, Aisling could've done worse she was sure.

"Will we be able to talk to Aisling or Malcolm to find out what's going on for sure?"

Jenna shrugged, "I don't know about Malcolm, but I know Aisling can come into this dreamscape still. That's how I got in contact with her in the first place."

"Well, do you know when she should come back to explain?"

"Nope," she shrugged again, "I don't know her schedule sorry. I'm sure she'll come as soon as she can though."

Trip frowned and leaned forward again, laying his head on his hands on the table. Jenna had the oddest urge to run her fingers through his hair in comfort but she held back. She'd never really been one for comforting or niceties such as that. She was a great friend, usually 'one of the guys' that was good for a 'good lay' on occasion, but when it came to relationships and stuff like that, she rather sucked at it. She was too flighty in thought, too random and odd for commitment and family stuff. At least, that's what she thought. Sure, sometimes she felt lonely even after having a good fuck, but there wasn't much she could do about it. Men weren't lining up on her doorstep begging for commitment, and she sure as hell didn't know how to look for it.

"What do you do here?" He asked, even though he still had his head on his hands.

Jenna smiled, "Oh lots of things! I've explored your ship numerous times, taken it to at least two worlds now, explored the worlds a bit, blown some things up, blasted music over the com system, streaked a few times," she giggled, "I must admit those were my favorite moments, and I've been eating as many different foods as possible. I've even learned your language, as you can hear quite well, and have started to learn how to juggle and dance the polka."

"Why the polka?" he still didn't raise his head but she thought she heard amusement in his voice.

Jenna shrugged, "Well I'm notorious for my randomness, so I just leafed through a list of dances and my finger fell on that. Its really quite fun and the music is quite catchy."

"I've always found it a bit annoying personally." Trip finally raised his head, "Always been better at the waltz myself."

Jenna grinned, "Well if you're still around in the future," she inwardly winced at her word choice but continued without batting an eye, "You'll have to teach me. It's always better to learn how to dance when you have a partner." She chuckled. "Actually there are a number of things that are better to do with a partner."

Trip raised his eyebrows, "What else have you been researching that would need a partner?"

"Well racquetball for one, fencing for another, and something called karma..no wait… umm… kama, yah that's right, kama sutra."

Trip's mouth fell open and she chuckled at the sight. He was really quite hot when he looked flabbergasted, she'd have to figure out how to make him so more often. Not that he wasn't hot all the time but he was just adorable like this.

"You mean to tell me you've been researching sex positions?" He sounded incredulous, and a bit scandalized.

Jenna eagerly nodded, "Of course! What are the first things anyone wants to know about a new culture?"

"Food, clothing, housing-" Trip looked like he was at a loss for a moment and Jenna quickly interrupted him.

"And sex! Everyone learns how to say 'bathroom' and curse words first and the customs they want to know about first are what you mentioned, yes, but also sexual practices." She chuckled at his offended look. "Oh admit it! It's true for nearly everyone out there! Just the more prudish ones aren't honest with themselves or others."

Trip sighed and she figured he was accepting his inner "pervert."

"Anyway, those are some of the things I've been learning that require a partner."

Trip again looked confused and a bit scandalized, "Are you meaning to tell me you want me to try out racquetball, fencing, and kama sutra with you?" His face was near burning with his adorable blush.

"Well," Jenna leaned forward and batted her eye lashes at him, "would you mind?"

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_Let me know what you think!_


	4. Figuring things out

_I own Jenna and Aisling and the idea of this story everything else…well if I owned it I'd be rich and wouldn't be writing this._

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Trip didn't know what to say to this alien creature. She was alien in more than just looks though. Everything about her was "alien" to him; her randomness, her opinions, her body language, even her interests were off. Not knowing what the hell was going on, where the hell he was-though she did try to explain that odd dreamscape thingy-and how the hell he was going to get back was one thing. But having all that weighing on his mind with Miss Oddity sitting across from him asking him to help her in her kama sutra research was in another galaxy in his mind.

"Hell yes I'd mind!" He nearly yelled but when she jumped back in her chair he calmed down enough to talk normally. "Look miss, I don't know you other than your own introduction. You've done explained to me, in your words, where I am but that don't mean diddlysquat to me. You're a stranger to me and so I don't trust you as far as I could throw you. So please forgive me if I decline an invitation into your pants."

Suddenly filled with ire and a huge build-up of frustration, Trip surged to his feet and stomped from the room, not caring if this Jenna woman followed him or not. If she was correct then there was no one else here and she needn't worry about him "escaping" this so called "dreamscape."

Trip didn't know how he ended up in the engine room, he hadn't meant to come here, but when he noticed the time a few hours later he noticed where he was and noticed what he was doing. He hadn't actually polished the chrome in the engine room since he'd nearly lost his cool as a cadet. He only ever polished anything in the engine room when he was seriously pissed off, confused, or otherwise upset.

Trip sat on the metal steps with his polishing rag dangling from his fingers. He stared off at nothing as his mind continued to toss and turn over the events since his awakening. He mulled over the information Jenna gave him and tried to make sense of it all but only came up with a headache. He was scowling with frustration by the time the headache reared its ugly head in full. He nearly jumped out of his skin when a glass of something was thrust in front of his face.

"Sorry," Jenna blushed as she withdrew the glass slightly, at least enough for him to focus on her face instead of the glass. "I figured you'd want something for a headache, since you've been brooding in here for a good four hours." She swirled the contents of the glass. "It's an herbal tea from Earth that supposedly helps with headaches. I don't know your infirmary too well so I figured this would be safer than trying to inject you with something."

Trip eyed the glass then the woman. She crossed her eyes at him and shifted her weight from one foot to another. "If I'd wanted you dead I would've already killed you. Don't think I'm trying to poison you so I can have my merry way with you either." She placed the glass down at his side and leaned against a metal post. "I prefer my men eager and willing not drooling and incapacitated."

"Usually." Another female voice echoed in the engine room and Trip had to crane his neck around to see another female, obviously swollen with child, standing at the top of the stairs. "You forgot to add the 'usually' to that sentence, Jenna."

Trip heard Jenna hiss, "Yah well that was a one time thing, Aisling, and it was your dare that caused that situation anyway."

The woman, Aisling, laughed and the sound was like raindrops on water. Trip couldn't help but feel a bit charmed by her beauty and grace. If this was indeed the woman Malcolm was with then he had good taste and good luck. At least he'd gotten sucked into a dreamscape with a gorgeous Venus and not into one with a good looking but equally odd and disconcerting Trojan.

"I take it you're the aunt Aisling who caused all this?" Trip swung his arm around to encompass the room and all its occupants.

Aisling nodded with a soft smile, "Malcolm asked me to bring you here in hopes that you would continue on."

"Continue on?" Trip shivered at those words.

Aisling looked to Jenna who managed to look innocent and guilty at the same time.

"You didn't tell him?"

Jenna growled, "How the hell am I supposed to tell a guy, who scared the shit outta me with his sudden appearance, that he's in fact dead!" Her eyes widened and she smacked a hand over her mouth.

Trip jumped to his feet and widely stared between the two women, one guilty looking, and the other calm.

"Is that true?" His voice shook. "Am I dead?"

Aisling nodded slowly, "Yes, Charles Tucker, you are indeed dead. If it weren't for my abilities your consciousness would've passed on with your body. However you were alert enough, in the end, for me to rescue your consciousness and bring it here, to my own old haven."

His legs suddenly felt wobbly and he sat down again. His movements shook the glass Jenna had set down before. He took hold of it and quickly downed the contents. He grimaced at the bitter taste but relished the fact that he could indeed taste at all. He was dead? Well, his body was dead? Did that mean that he would never again see his friends? Never again touch his family? Never again…be the man that he was? An engineer, a friend, a lover, a man?

"You are struggling right now," Aisling's voice was calming but at this point in time he was beyond it, "I'm sure you want answers to questions you don't know how to ask." Trip nodded but kept silent. "I can tell you right now, unless Jenna herself allows your consciousness into her mind, you will be here, in this dreamscape, for the rest of eternity."

Trip heard Jenna's hiss again and he looked up to see her face. For the first time since he'd seen her it didn't look like it was ready to pull up into an easy smile or emit laughter or nonsense. It was grave and pulled tight with seriousness. Her eyes were hard and he could see that she had indeed seen a great many things and lived through some hard times. However, he got the feeling she knew more about the situation than he did.

"If she allows me? You're saying that I'm basically stuck here? I can't go anywhere or be with anyone except Jenna and maybe on occasion you?"

Aisling sighed and dropped gracefully into a sitting position, "Our race of beings can transfer consciousness from one body to another, did Jenna tell you that much?" Trip nodded, as did Jenna. "Well since you are not of our race and do not possess our powers you of your own accord could not go anywhere outside this dreamscape. You can pilot the ship around, even take it back to your Earth, but you will not find any other living beings. Just the planet will be there but no people or animals."

A whole eternity with only Jenna as a companion with the occasional breath of fresh air with Aisling? Trip didn't know if surviving his own death was worth it.

"You may be thinking about death now," Jenna growled and Trip turned to look at her, "but don't. Aisling may have brought you here but she can't do anything to help you, including kill you. Since she's already in Malcolm's mind, and she's pregnant, she has limited abilities. She already risked the baby's life by bringing you here." Jenna scratched her head then leveled a hard gaze on him. "The only way for you to die is if I killed you. Just like the only way for you to leave is if I take you."

Trip felt contempt for this woman, "So that means I'm indebted to you? I have to do whatever you want in order to buy my way out of this hell?" He felt like punching her but didn't, he was raised to never hit a lady.

"Like hell you do! You think I volunteered for this?! I didn't! I'm just as surprised as you! Do you think I signed up for this responsibility? Nope again! I've never wanted a committed relationship and now I have one whether I like it or not!"

Trip snarled right back at her, "Then kill me!"

Jenna closed her eyes and he got the feeling she was counting to ten. She evened her breathing and loosened her grip on the railing. When she opened her eyes again Trip felt like he was looking at the woman he'd initially met, the happy-go-lucky one, not the hardened one.

"I'll see you later," She walked past him up the stairs and pressed a soft kiss to Aisling's brow, "Drop by anytime, Aisling, but try to keep the man saving to a minimum. Just one is bad enough." She smiled at Aisling, glared slightly at Trip, then left.

Trip looked back down at his hands as he and Aisling sat in silence for a few moments. She was the one to break it.

"She had to kill her husband in order to save herself." Trip looked up at Aisling with wide eyes. "She's basically blocked it from her mind and won't admit to it but it happened. Both of their minds could not fit inside one body and he told her to kill him so she could survive. Of course she didn't want to, being who she is Jenna would never willing kill anyone or anything she committed herself to. However, Ferith reminded her of her mission to find me and end the wars on our world and appealed to both her familial and loyal nature." Aisling sighed and shook her head. "I only found out through a general friend of mine who worked closely with her. She refuses to talk about it."

Trip looked back down at his hands and kept silent, figuring Aisling had more to say.

"Even though she doesn't know you she won't kill you. She hasn't killed anyone since Ferith and I don't think she will, ever again."

Silence fell in the room again and Trip understood that Aisling was done with her explanation. He rubbed his hands together then looked back down to the now empty glass. This was going to be a very rough existence, having to deal with a woman who had emotional baggage out the whazoo and enough personality for three people but he supposed he could do it. He had no choice so he had to do it.

"It'll get easier," Aisling spoke softly and Trip looked up to see that her image was fading, "in time the two of you will form a friendship and it'll be easier for both of you." She smiled. "After all, you only have each other."

Trip was left staring into space where Aisling once was. Though his headache had gone away it was now back, with a new vengeance. He supposed the reality of his situation was finally setting in and his mind was rebelling. His mind and his emotions. Trip sighed as he stood and started towards the infirmary, figuring he'd find something in there to combat the headache. In the process perhaps he'd come up with a how-to-live-with-Jenna plan as well.

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_Hope you've enjoyed thus far, sorry it took me so long to update._


	5. Getting hurt and making up

_I don't own Star Trek, just my own characters and this plot. Hope you're enjoying—sorry its taken so long to update. Living in Taiwan is awesome but it distracts! Hehe!_

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What a bloody bastard! Jenna stormed down the hall towards the exercise room, or whatever it was these people called it. Her whole body hummed with anger and frustration. The nerve of the man! Basically accusing her of using his desperate situation against him so that she could use and abuse him to her delight…what a bloody asshole!

Jenna made her way to the punching bag that hung idly in the corner and attacked it with a vengeance. Yes, this new body of hers was much smaller and maybe a bit weaker than she was used to, but if she had anything to do with it, she'd train it to be just as strong and quick as her old ones. As it was, though, she just got angrier at herself and Trip when she started panting after a few minutes of heavy duty boxing.

She let out a loud groan, moving on to the running machines. Why did Aisling do this? She understood the reasons, yes, and yet she didn't. Malcolm didn't want Trip to die, okay she understood that. Stealing his consciousness and placing into the traces of her old dreamscape also made sense to Jenna as well. However, what made her blood boil was Trip's reaction to the facts of the situation. Did he honestly think she'd volunteered for this? Did it look like she enjoyed having the power to kill him in the blink of an eye?

Jenna tripped on the machine and fell down, the momentum of the still moving machine causing her to fly backwards against the wall, crashing into a very uncomfortable heap. She cursed once her body settled from the fall and the reality of pain started to set in. If she had known that the stack of weight beside her was already tilted and was prone to fall then she probably would've gotten up a lot quicker but as it were she did not know and could only yelp in pain as the entire heap of weights collapsed on top of her.

"That's going to bruise." She growled once the weights stopped falling, removing her hands from her head where she'd attempted to protect herself.

Thankfully none of the weights had been more then fifteen pounds and the heavier ones had merely rolled to the side of her body instead of falling on her. However, a five pound weight falling on your head still hurt like hell. Jenna suddenly felt a little dizzy and she reached up to touch her head. When she pulled her hand back she frowned at the red substance staining her fingers.

"Shit." She smiled despite her pain, amusement at her pain and the situation slowly dawning in her dizzy mind. "That's a bit more than a bruise."

She shook her head carefully, trying to stop the dizziness, but that only made it worse. She took a few steadying breaths to get over the wave of nausea that suddenly came. When the room stopping doing a jig and her stopped mimicking, she carefully pulled herself up to a standing position. The first few steps were wobbly, and quite painful considering the ten pounder had landed on her left foot dead on. By the time she made it to the corridor her head was spinning again and her stomach felt like it was going to jump out of her mouth in rebellion.

Jenna closed her eyes against the spinning world around her and leaned against the cool wall of the corridor. She'd just wait for a few moments until the worst of the spinning went away. She knew she had a concussion; it'd be difficult NOT to get one with multiple metal weights falling on your head and body; she also knew that the infirmary was one level up. She muttered a few more curses before she opened her eyes and started moving again.

By the time she reached the turbo lift her face was damp with sweat, a nice little stream of blood from the wound on her head had seeped its way down the back of her head and was starting to stain her shirt, and she'd dry heaved at least a dozen times. She seriously hated this body! It was so bloody weak compared to the ones she'd been in before. She did NOT envy Aisling and her naturally fragile nature—Aisling probably would've died from the weight falling on her.

Jenna tried to distract herself from the pain, dizziness, and nausea by listing off all her relatives—their species didn't believe in birth control and so she was only just getting start on the list by the time she made it to the infirmary doors. She sighed with relief when they swished open, knowing that relief could be found within, but groaned in pain and frustration when she saw Trip rummaging around in one of the cabinets.

When he turned and looked at her she saw that his initial expression was one of surprise—he probably still wasn't used to her presence—then distaste followed that, and finally a little trace of concern fell into place when he saw her sway on her feet.

"Don't worry, I'm not about to pounce on you." Jenna spoke through clenched teeth, trying to control her breathing against the pain. "I'm here for medical attention, not you." She did her best to walk with a straight back to the tray of medical supplies beside the closest bio bed.

She sat on the bed with a sigh and turned to the medical tray. There was a hypospray, probably filled with a pain killer; she administered that first, not even flinching. There was also a salve of some kind that she figured she could put on the wound, and hopefully it'd help it heal and not cause some flower to grow out of it. And finally the last item that was there that she needed was a round ball of white gauze she could use to wrap around her head.

So interested in her own pain and getting rid of it she didn't hear or notice Trip move closer until his hand batted away her own when she reached for the salve. She glared up at him, though her glare was ruined by the obviousness of her pain.

"What do you want?" She tried to get the salve back from him, but closed her eyes when her sudden movements caused the room to swim again.

Trip snorted, "I'm trying to help you, if you hadn't noticed. Now lower your head." He waited until she finally gave up and did as instructed before he spoke again. "What on earth happened anyway?"

"I had a nasty argument with a few weights. We disagreed on the laws of gravity." Jenna winced when the cool sting of the salve was pressed into the cut on her head. "They figured they still applied here and I begged to differ." She held her breath for a moment to keep from hissing in pain. "Needless to say, they're laughing their asses off right now."

Jenna heard Trip snort and she glanced up to see a slight smile on his lips. Well at least he found her pain and possibly her comments amusing—maybe that was a step in the right direction…or maybe that just meant Trip was a sadist.

"How did the weights manage to fall on your head?" He pulled away and set the salve back on the table. "Wait did you say 'weights?'"

"Yup." Jenna carefully nodded her head and watched as Trip started to unravel the gauze. "That would be plural, correct."

Trip shook his head, another small smile touching his lips. Jenna didn't try to make eye contact with him, at the moment she was too fascinated with his hands. They weren't overly large, but in her present body they were much larger and stronger than her own. They were steady, capable, strong, and nice looking. They looked like they could cause pain and pleasure. At the moment, as he tightly wrapped the gauze around her head, it was pain, but maybe…nah. There'd be no pleasure to be had with him. At least not for her.

Once he was finished and stepped back, Jenna felt the hypospray had helped her headache enough to roll her head around a bit. She nearly yelped at the pain. Already the muscles where the weights had fallen were bunched up into angry knots. It would take a good soak in a hot bath, a long massage, and a lot of chocolate to get rid of the pain and the knots.

"What else is wrong?" Trip asked, his eyebrows raised when he saw her reach for her shoulders.

Jenna sighed, "Well although they aren't bleeding, my muscles certainly hate me enough to be pouring blood in protest right now."

"I have some cream in my room that helps with muscle pain." When she gave him a quizzical look he just shrugged. "Working with machinery one never knows when something might fall. Besides I always carry my stress in my shoulders. T'Pol would help alleviate my stress from time to time." His eyes grew distant for a minute and Jenna knew he was thinking about his current situation in regards to his past. When his eyes cleared he gave her a slight smile but she knew it wasn't for her. "I could rub some on your shoulders if it's really bad."

Jenna looked at him as if he'd grown another head, "Who are you and what did you do with the hostile Trip I had to deal with not two hours ago?"

"Yah," Trip scratched the back of his head, looking quite sheepish and much like a school boy, "about that, I um, well you see, that is…" he sighed and finally looked her straight in the eyes, the first time since she'd come into the infirmary, "I'm sorry for the things I said. I didn't understand the situation for what it truly was and I jumped to conclusions. I shouldn't have made such assumptions on your character." He finally stopped playing with the hair on the back of his head and dropped his hand back to his side. "Can we move past that and act like I hadn't been a complete bastard to you?"

Jenna wanted to throw something at him at the same time she wanted to hug him. He was truly a cutie and it would damn difficult keeping her hands off him. That was part of the reason she wanted to throw something at him. The other was his wanting to "act like it never happened" attitude. She despised that attitude!

"We can move past it but I am not the type to act like something wasn't said or done," she leveled a direct look at him and he didn't look away, "just don't do that again."

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_I hope you've enjoyed this! I'll try to update soon!_


	6. Lending a helping hand

_Ta da! It's an update!_

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He'd had to help keep her from falling more than once on the way to his quarters. He was surprised she was so quiet about her pain, but then again he had to remember that despite her appearances she'd been through hell more than once and probably was accustomed to dealing with pain. It was going to take a while to get used to this whole being dead and yet not business. After his lecture from Aisling, and his own mental condemnation, Trip had decided to at least befriend Jenna. Maybe he could find some purpose to his new existence through his friendship with her. Or maybe he was just furthering his own torture, only time would tell.

"I swear your room is moving away from us." Jenna gripped at the wall of the corridor and Trip raised his hands in instinct to keep her from falling if she chose to do so.

Trip smiled despite the fact that he still wanted to scream and shout at the heavens for taking him away from what he'd always known and thrust him into this new world of uncertainty and dependence on this quirky creature swaying beside him. Once Jenna stopped swaying they started forward again, neither commenting on her condition or vulnerability. Trip got the feeling she wouldn't take too kindly to being reminded of her fragile status. From what he gathered from Aisling, Jenna was used to being strong and in control, and here she was in a inferior body, wounded no less.

"Here we are." Trip leaned forward and pressed the keypad to open his door, waiting until she'd moved inside before he followed. "Have a seat and I'll get that cream." He moved into the bathroom.

If he thought about it, Jenna really wasn't too bad—or maybe he was just more sympathetic towards her now that he'd seen her bleed. Sure she was crazy, moody, with a hellofalotof emotional baggage but who wasn't all of those things? He had to admit that even on his own best day he was moody with a bit of craziness in him. Emotional baggage? Well, the death of his sister had never stopped haunting him, nor had the things they'd had to do while in the Expanse for self-preservation. So in a way, he was so different from Jenna, if he thought about it. However, she made it difficult to think sometimes with her words and antics. Perhaps they'd just gotten off on the wrong foot—her requesting his help in her research on kama sutra definitely didn't help matter any.

Trip took a deep breath and slowly let it out before he returned to the main room with the cream in hand. He looked around when he didn't immediately see Jenna. He was surprised and a little taken aback when he found her sprawled on his bed. He inched closer and was even further surprised to see she'd taken off her shirt and shoes. He was about to comment on this when he noticed the ugly bruises the weights had left—it certainly didn't take long for them to form on her skin. He also noticed that the tattoo did indeed go all the way down her back and branched off at her hips to wrap around to her front.

"You certainly don't waste any time do you?" He dryly commented once he'd gotten his fill of her and had pulled a chair beside the bed.

Jenna grunted, "You offered and I complied. The worst knots would've been difficult to reach with my shirt on." He watched her twist her head around, as it had been facing away from him, and she grunted at bit in pain until she settled again. "Don't worry, this isn't a seduction. You're southern ass is safe with me right now."

Trip laughed. It surprised both of them but once he stopped neither mentioned it. Jenna merely closed her eyes and waited and Trip opened the canister and lathered a good amount of the cool cream on his fingers. He rubbed his hands together to warm the cream a bit before h finally placed his hands on her back. She still tensed a little at his touch, probably from the chilliness of the cream, or perhaps just because it was him, he didn't know and did his best to keep from dwelling on it.

It wasn't hard finding the knots, they were quite obvious, and he did his best to work them out gently. However, he couldn't prevent her from turning her head and biting the pillow from time to time to keep from moaning in pain when he pressed a bit too hard on a particularly stubborn knot. Neither spoke; there really wasn't much to talk about. Trip, once he was satisfied he'd gotten the worst of the knots, still didn't stop. He figured since he'd caused her so much pain getting the knots out he at least could soothe away some of the pain with a relaxing massage.

"You don't have to continue," Jenna mumbled through the pillow, not bothering to move her head to speak, "I know your hands must be tired."

Trip shook his head, even though he knew she couldn't see, "It's no problem. Consider this part of my apology for my behavior earlier."

He heard what could've been a sputtering of laughter and he saw her back shake slightly. He raised his eyebrows at this and paused in his ministrations until she spoke again.

"In that case, rub away. In fact, don't even think about stopping until your hands cramp up and feel like falling off." Her voice was muffled again but she'd turned her head to look at him from the corner of her eyes.

He could see the smile on her lips, and in her eyes, and returned it, though to a lesser degree. "Out for blood are we?"

She nodded before closing her eyes again, "Always."

Trip didn't find it hard to believe that. He merely chuckled as he continued his movements. He fell into a rhythm and soon his mind hit "screen saver mode" and time slipped away. He didn't know how much time had passed but when he'd come back to himself he found her asleep. He still didn't stop though. There was something relaxing about rubbing her skin, pressing the softness between his fingers and caressing his palms over it. All this time he'd been able to smell her natural scent of roses and in sleep it seemed the scent had only increased and so he didn't stop himself from deeply inhaling the relaxing scent.

Thoughts, memories, hopes, regret, they all took prominence in his mind at one time or another as he sat there. Jenna's deep breathing and the slight sounds of his hands running over her skin were all the noises in the room. For the first time since he'd woken in this odd reality, Trip felt himself relax enough to realize he was tired. He pulled away from Jenna's body and stood, wincing slightly when he found his own knots and kinks in his neck and back from sitting too long in one position. He found an extra blanket and carefully draped it over Jenna's form before moving back into the bathroom to put the cream back.

He stopped and stared at himself in the mirror. The climax of his thoughts and musing hit him then: this was it. This was what and who he was and this was what he was going to get out of the new life he had. There was no going back, not even a hope of doing so. All that was offered to him now was either a form of life or death, and even then death wasn't really an option either. Trip took a deep breath and lowered his head. He could fall into a deep depression, attempt to kill himself, throw away whatever sanity he had now and fall into madness. Or…Trip looked into the mirror again and let out the breath he'd been holding. Or he could make the best of what he had.

Trip shut the door to the bathroom and slowly removed his clothing. He took his time, letting his options mull about in his head. However, with every article of clothing discarded the more he realized he wasn't the type to give up. By the time he entered the shower and turned it on he knew that he was going to try and make the best of the life he had now.

What exactly that meant…he didn't exactly know yet.

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_I know its short but its what I had in mind for this chapter. Please review!_


	7. Getting acquainted like civilized people

_I'm on a roll eh? What do you think so far? Do you have any requests on what you want to happen here? I'm open to suggestions! Hehe!_

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Jenna woke with a splitting headache and the strange feeling of not being alone. She carefully opened her eyes and studied the room around her. She remembered where she was, it wasn't like she'd been drunk on relaxation after Trip's massage, however she didn't remember where he was. When she'd fallen asleep he'd still been sitting by the bed rubbing her back. Now he was…where?

Jenna yawned and carefully stretched, careful not to let the blanket uncover her torso since she was blissfully naked up top though still clothed down bottom. She slowly sat up and turned to put her feet on the floor. She yelped in surprise when her feet encountered something warm and equally soft and hard. When she looked over the edge of the bed she found a yawning Trip staring back up at her.

"That's got to be one of the rudest awakenings I've had in a long time." He blinked away his sleepiness and gave her a lopsided smile.

Jenna cursed herself when she felt her insides melt at the lovely image of his smiling, and sexy, face looking up at her. He didn't have a shirt on but he did have pajama bottoms on, and the fact that he didn't have a shirt on was very apparent since it was difficult for her to keep her eyes from traveling south when looking at him.

"Sorry about that," she smiled back at him, liking the new cordiality he seemed to be offering her, "I didn't know where you were." She looked around for her shirt but continued speaking while doing so, "Thank your for the awesome massage by the way. Even though I still feel some of the bruises, I feel a whole heck of a lot better than I would've without your help." Finally spotting her shirt she reached forward for it.

However she misjudged Trip's blanket length and nearly gave him an eyeful of her breasts. He thankfully seemed blissfully ignorant since he'd turned and grabbed her shirt and by the time he'd turned around to hand it to her she had righted the blanket around her chest. She smiled and nodded her thanks. He merely shrugged before standing and moving into the bathroom, leaving her with some privacy to put her shirt back on.

When he came back out she saw that he'd changed into civilian clothing and she had to keep her mouth from dropping open in desire. He wore a blue button down oxford with blue jeans and his hair was slightly damp from his having combed it back. He saw her staring and raised his eyebrows. She merely shrugged before moving past him into the bathroom, wanting to sink into the floor at having been caught oogling him.

After a quick but lovely shower, she felt more prepared to meet him. Now she just needed to change her blood stained clothes and get another hypospray and salve treatment for her head. She informed Trip of his and he wasn't adverse to the idea of helping her out with the treatment. Mentally she told herself she wouldn't mind him helping her with her clothes either, but she kept this dirty little thought to herself.

Jenna was about Hoshi's size, just with bigger breasts, and so she used her wardrobe. Choosing a plain white t-shirt with embroidered blue jeans from her options she quickly changed and went back out to meet Trip, who'd stayed in the corridor. His eyes lingered on her a little longer than they usually did but she thought little of it. He probably was just remembering Hoshi wearing the same outfit at some point in time.

They didn't really speak until they were in the infirmary. However, surprisingly, the silence hadn't been awkward like it had been previously. Though it was still far from a companionable silence it had at least been tolerable. Jenna wondered about the change in Trip but didn't say anything about it while he poked about the cut on her head and started to work on it again.

"So are you interested in learning a few cards games today?"

His question came out of no where and Jenna was caught a little off guard, "Huh?"

"I asked if you were interested in learning a few card games today." He pulled back and reached for the gauze, leveling his gaze on her. "When we first met you told me you'd been experimenting and learning about human culture. I figured I could offer you what I knew. I could teach you card games, introduce you to amazing human cinema, and equally amazing Southern music and cuisine." He gave her a cute smile that made her insides melt again. "What do you think?"

Jenna had to keep herself from telling him she thought he was the cutest ever and that it'd been decades since she'd even kissed someone in her own body and would he mind ever so much if she molested him on the bio bed. Instead she smiled back and nodded. His face lit up like a little child's and he immediately started to list off titles of movies and music and items of food and names of games that she had no idea about but figured before the end of the day, or week, she'd know them all intimately.

When he finished and she'd given herself a hypospray he looked ready to bounce up and down in excitement. She figured he'd been an adorable child because he was certainly delicious as an adult. There were so many times when his eyes lit up with passion, his lips curling into an amused smile, his voice sounding like honey to her ears, that she nearly gave into the temptation to run her fingers through his hair, to wrap her arms around his waist and hold him tight, to inhale deeply the slightly spicy scent that was him, to press her lips against his and relish the thrill of finally being close to someone again, in her own body, after decades of loneliness.

However, whenever this temptation became nearly unbearable, she'd remind herself of the anger and distrust he'd shown her, the accusations he'd flung at her, and basically just the cursed situation he was in. She couldn't take advantage of him—that would be a violation of her own morals and a betrayal to him. She knew that if given a choice he'd be alive and with his friends in a heartbeat and so…she just couldn't touch him. She knew in her heart that she wouldn't be able to touch him without regret unless he wouldn't regret being touched by her and reminded of his new curse.

"So what do you think of Brad Paisley?" His question brought her out of her mental musings.

It had been a long day of learning from him. It had been equally fun and equally frustrating. While she'd enjoyed the games and the food and the general fun she could glean from being around him, she didn't enjoy the general longing that was developing in her heart for him.

"I think he's amusing. There are some instruments that I don't particularly like in country music but most the subjects are amusing and I do so love to laugh." She smiled and nodded, doing her best to shove her more melancholy thoughts away so her more usual and boisterous tendencies could take over again.

Trip nodded and smiled, "Yah most people either love or hate country music, let alone the lyrics." He downed the last of his sweet tea and eyed her half empty glass. "Do you not like the tea?"

"No," Jenna laughed and picked up her glass, "I'm sorry I've been reflecting on the music and all the stuff you've showed me today. The tea is good," she took a generous sip and let the cool sweetness slowly trickle down her throat, "quite relaxing."

Trip nodded again and started talking about some memory of his home and family. He'd done that a lot today as well. Every time he spoke of these memories she despised his presence here and adored it. She hated her aunt for saving him from death, and she loved her. To have Trip survive in spirit with the knowledge of never again tasting the sweetness of his previous life was a fate worse than death in Jenna's mind. A soul such as Trip's existed and flourished on the delights of relationships and traditions. He'd find neither here.

"Which reminds me I'm going to show you a particularly amusing movie tonight," his voice brought her back again and she smiled, thankful to not be in her own mind. "Don't suppose you've ever heard of 'Monty Python' have you?" Jenna shook her head and he grinned ear to ear. "Wonderful! I think you'll love it! Especially since you're so fond of laughing." He winked at her and she mentally sighed like a school girl.

Jenna nodded, "Do you mind if I freshen up in my room before the movie though?" She glanced down at the once white shirt that was splattered with stains from the sloppy joe Trip had fed her.

She heard Trip chuckled and she looked up to find him wiggling his eyebrows in amusement. She rolled her eyes at him, though she felt her smile begin in her heart and work its way onto her lips.

"I don't mind at all. Just meet me in here in about an hour okay? I'll have the screen and movie ready as well as," he grinned again, "the characteristic popcorn."

Jenna had no idea what popcorn was but she smiled and nodded, "Okay. I'll be back then." She stood and headed towards the door, giving him a slight wave before disappearing from the room.

She dearly hoped the movie was as good as he said it would be, because she needed to be distracted from her melancholy thoughts.

* * *

_Again it's a bit short but I hope you liked it. Please let me know what you think!_


	8. May I kiss you?

_Sorry it's taken me so long to update. I've been busy with work, and other stories._

* * *

Trip was actually surprised at how much he'd enjoyed himself today. Jenna was a quick study, and an amusing companion. She wasn't as crazy today as she had been in the past, he was fairly certain her bruises were keeping her more subdued today, but she was still plucky. He was still smiling at some of her comments and reactions as he finished setting up for the movie and waited in one of the seats for her to return.

He was already planning on teaching her some more about Southern culture tomorrow, and was planning a list of movies and songs to introduce her to. Of course, he couldn't forget her own list of "to dos." He casually avoided even thinking about her kama sutra curiosity and instead thought of her dancing and such. Maybe after the movie he could show her some good Southern dance songs and teach her a thing or two.

"Sorry I took so long," he looked up when he heard her voice accompanied by the ever present scent of roses, "I had a harder time finding a shirt that fit."

Trip swallowed the sudden lump in his throat and made sure his mouth was shut when he nodded. What made her think that shirt fit? He could see every contour of her chest and abdomen! No, he didn't need a very vivid imagination to conjure up what she would look like without a shirt on. The shirt looked painted on! Trip stood up and went to grab the popcorn, his movements a bit jerky in his distraction.

Jenna meanwhile pulled the jacket she'd been holding over her shoulders and slipped her arms in. However, given her new body's tendency towards klutziness, she got the zipper caught in her hair and yelped when her efforts to yank it free didn't work.

"Careful or you'll rip out a chunk of your hair!" Trip set the popcorn down on their seats and quickly made his way to stand behind her. "I'll help you."

Jenna nodded, finding the position of her arms tangled above her head to keep the pressure off her hair a little awkward. She could smell him and her insides did that annoying clench that they always did whenever she smelled him. Oh why couldn't he smell like garbage or really pungent body odor! No, he had to smell all musky and sexy. Just her luck!

"There you go," he helped her finish putting the jacket on, his hands straying to her shoulders for a brief moment before stepping back and handing her the popcorn, "everything good now?"

Jenna nodded, masking her nervousness behind a smile, "I don't know what it is about this silly body but I keep getting tangled up and hurt. Maybe it's just a bit harder to adjust to having my own body this time." She shrugged as she accepted the popcorn and sat down beside him.

"You know I've been wondering about your whole 'new body' comments," he scratched his head, "When you were inside that guy, whatever his name was, did you not have control over his body or were you just like a bystander?"

Jenna took a bite of the popcorn and nearly purred, "This is so good! I hope you have a good supply because this isn't going to be nearly enough!" She grinned at him as she took another bite.

"Are you going to answer me or ignore my question?" Trip turned his gaze to the screen in front of them, his finger ready to press the power button to start the movie.

"I was more of a bystander. I felt what he felt whenever someone touched him, but I had no feelings of my own. His sensory recognitions were dull for me so I basically only experienced what he did to a much lesser degree. Sometimes he would allow me control but even then I would only feel what he was conditioned to feel, not what I myself wanted to feel. So if I had even wanted to pursue a man, while in his body, I would only have felt disgust and such when his body touched mine because my friend was still inside his own body." Jenna sighed as she continued to munch on the popcorn. "It has been a good few decades actually since I have my own body to experience life." She held up the popcorn and smiled at him, "That is why I'm trying to experience as many new tastes, sights, sounds, and tactile senses as possible. I've been living in a grey haze for so long, without taste of my own, sights of my own, or touch of my own…sounds rather depressing I know. But survival in war is key, and that existence is better than death when you still have unfinished business."

Trip listened quietly, surprised again at the strength of the woman beside him. To the eyes she just looked like walking, talking sex—that was the complete truth of the matter. She acted immature from time to time, very random and crazy, and not at all what one would expect of a battle hardened warrior. However, in moments of seriousness such as these, he couldn't help but admire the strength of character that she had. He figured she coped with the pain by all her crazy stunts. He coped by his jokes so he could empathize.

"Well I think you'll enjoy laughing on your own during this movie," Trip turned the movie on and settled back, "and don't worry there's plenty of popcorn."

The movie was a hit with her and Trip laughed even more than usual because of her reactions. There were parts where he previously had only chuckled that he laughed uproariously merely because her laughter was infectious. By the end of the movie, they had both cried multiple times from laughing so hard. Trip knew his own stomach muscles were sore from laughing so much, he could only guess that hers were in a similar state. They'd gone through at least four bowls each of popcorn and at least three grape sodas in addition.

"Oh wow, Trip," Jenna clutched at her stomach as she leaned back in her chair, "That was simply wonderful! I don't think I've laughed that hard in years," she tipped her head to the side then chuckled, "actually I know I haven't laughed that hard in decades!"

Trip looked surprised then again had to remind himself that she'd only had her own body for a short amount of time, "Well I'm glad I was able to help fix that."

Jenna helped Trip take down the screen and put the dirty dishes into the kitchen. When they came back out both of them had burped and apologized then laughed. They stood in the mess hall for a moment, neither saying anything, until Trip suddenly snapped his fingers.

"Now I remember what I wanted to do after the movie." He turned and grabbed her wrist, pulling her after him as he left the mess and headed towards one of the observation rooms.

"I don't suppose you're going to tell me what it is you're dragging me to?" Jenna chuckled as he continued to pull her, though she managed to keep up and walked more beside him now, not even trying to pull her wrist from his warm hand.

Trip shook his head, a playful smile on his lips, "Hell no! That would ruin the fun!"

Jenna only laughed as they continued for a few moments longer. When they appeared in the observation room, Trip left her standing by one of the big windows while he disappeared behind a wall. Within moments the lights turned off and only the light from the passing stars and the various consols on the walls shone in the room. Jenna smiled and clasped her hands behind her back as she waited. Next came a happy tune than made her feet immediately start tapping to the beat.

When Trip reappeared by her side she knew what he was doing. He was teaching how to dance! He'd remembered! She laughed aloud as he swung her in a big circle before standing opposite her. She didn't pay attention to time as Trip proceeded to teach her not only the basic polka but also three different line dances and a square dance as well. By the time the music changed to a slower tempo, both of them were panting from dancing and laughing.

"What's this dance?" Jenna asked as she listened to the much slower tempo, the music somehow calling to her soul.

Trip had been standing slightly in front of her with his back to her, having been showing her another line dance, but at her voice he turned around, a soft smile on his face. He stepped forward and took her hands. Jenna did her best to remind herself that he was just being nice and wasn't interested in her romantically as he placed one of her hands on his shoulder while he held the other one firmly in his own hand. She nearly shivered but caught herself before she did so when his other hand settled itself on her spine in her upper back. They were a good foot or so apart from each other but still Jenna knew her face was flushed for entirely different reasons now.

"This is the waltz. It originated in Europe but us Southern folks love it. I'll show you the proper waltz that the stuffy Europeans like to do," he pulled her into movement, the first few moments jerky as she learned the steps slowly, "but then I'll show you the more Southernized version. I'm sure you'll take a much bigger liking to it."

Jenna could only nod as she continued to follow his movements as they moved around the room. He began to hum along with the song and she again felt her insides clench. It was no longer about sex. Nope, that had disappeared hours and hours ago. Now, she was in danger of falling in love with him and that scared the shit out of her. She hadn't loved anyone since her husband. She hadn't wanted to love anyone and now…her heart was softening towards a man who didn't even want to be with her, and technically should've been dead.

On his part, Trip was also in a state of confusion and slight turmoil. He knew he wanted to be alive and with his friends and family. If he was given the chance he wouldn't blink before taking that chance to return to his life from before. However, here he found himself enjoying the feeling of Jenna in his arms. It didn't feel like a mere attraction towards her. It went beyond sex. In fact, even from the beginning he hadn't wanted to have sex with her. No, it was something different. Something he'd actually never felt with a woman before, not even T'Pol. He was genuinely starting to enjoy nearly everything about Jenna, from her wacky sense of humor to her rather loud laughter. If he felt like this after only the short amount of time they'd been together then…what would he feel like after years?

Because that's what he had to look forward to; years of her company, at least that was if she remained in this dreamscape and didn't return to her reality. Of course she could always take him with her, but he knew little about how that would work or what he would have to do. If he DID have to stay in this dreamscape, or with her, he supposed he could stand it. Especially if things continued on the track they seemed to be on.

"Now," Trip's voice broke the silence, "I'll show you the Southern way."

Jenna only nodded and held her breath as he pulled her closer, moving her arms to wind around his neck while he placed his hands gently on her mid back. Jenna didn't stop the shiver this time and she saw Trip's eyes soften slightly when he felt her do so. They were much closer this time, though their fronts weren't touching. She had no where to look but at his face and he returned the favor. He continued to hum the song and Jenna smiled at him for doing so. It was a moment that she would cherish for a long time to come.

She didn't know how long it took for them to realize they were dancing to merely his humming, as the song had ended a while back, but when they did notice they didn't pull away quite yet. Jenna nibbled her lower lip in nervousness and that nervousness just tripled when she saw Trip's eyes watch her lips.

"Jenna," Jenna felt her stomach tighten from the sound of her name on his lips, "may I," she felt his hand tighten just slightly on her back and she found herself drawn slightly closer to him, "may I kiss you?"

* * *

_Yes, I am THAT mean to leave it there! ^__^_


	9. Their conversation was FAR from over

Jenna stiffened almost immediately and stepped out of Trip's warm embrace. She couldn't, wouldn't, give into this. He didn't really want HER. She just happened to be the one he was stuck with. If given the chance he'd scurry off back to his reality, leaving her and any possibility of ever seeing her again, in the dust of his tracks. If she'd been able to survive this long without…well without then she could continue to survive without. Even if he was now a willing participant she no longer wanted…well she did want him but she couldn't allow herself to have him. Even SHE had standards, and sleeping with him just to sleep with him was well below them.

Throughout this day he'd proven to her that he was someone she could allow herself to grow close to. Given time she knew she'd soften and even possibly love him. No, she couldn't just have sex with such a man. If she shared physical intimacies with him then it'd be that much harder for her. She'd already gone through hell a few times; she really didn't want to make another trip.

"Thank you for the nice evening, Trip. I really enjoyed it. Now I'm tired and will leave." She turned on her heel, knowing in her gut that he wouldn't let her leave but still hoping that he would.

He didn't disappoint her gut when she felt his hand wrap around her upper arm and halt her in her tracks, "What-? Why the sudden coldness? Did I do something?"

"Did you…" She looked at him with shock and cynical amusement. "Did you do something? My goodness! Men can be so bloody stupid!" She threw her arms up in the air and stormed out of the room, wincing at the brightness of the lights in the corridor.

He didn't take long to catch up with her, though he didn't try to stop her this time. He merely hurried along beside her as she marched swiftly.

"I'm serious, Jenna. I thought we'd gotten past the cold, awkwardness of before. I thought you had as good a day as I did. From where I was standing a moment ago you looked like you wanted to kiss me." He seemed to realize how arrogant he sounded and immediately blubbered on. "I mean, that is to say…damn it Jenna why are you so angry?" He did grab her shoulder and swung her around to face him. "Don't walk away from this. Tell me what the hell is going on in that crazy head of yours!"

Jenna merely looked at him, her face an expressionless mask. Her lack of reaction seemed to remind him of his cold words and he was good enough to look sheepish but he still remained silent, waiting for her to explain or walk away again. She kept her clenched fists at her sides as she looked him squarely in the eyes. She could be honest with him and make herself vulnerable with that honesty. What was the harm in that anyway? He was dead to the real world, only alive to her and her aunt and to a lesser degree Malcolm. He had no where to go unless she chose to transport him into her own consciousness. But then again, she had no where to go either.

She'd left that little tidbit out of her conversations with her aunt. The transference into her new body had worked out perfectly, however the assassin sent to kill her had also worked perfectly as well. She'd been alive only long enough to make a dreamscape getaway. Now, her real body was dead and she only had this dreamscape, and any other she chose to create, to live in. That wasn't so bad for her; she was used to solitude really. She knew that after a few decades, or sooner, she would've gotten tired of it all and merely allowed her consciousness to slip away into nothing. At least, that's what she would've done if she'd been alone.

Now, however, she had another consciousness to think about. She had Trip, whether either of them liked it or not. With her powers she could make a dreamscape anywhere and they could live out their days together. She had no power to transport him into reality; she didn't even have that power for herself. She could kill him, that was true, but she wasn't going to. So here they were, stuck with one another. So would she be honest with him?

"I don't want to fall in love with you." Yes, she was going to be honest—what the hell anyway. "At least not at long as your heart is constantly thinking of what you would be doing if you were alive, who you would see and the things you'd do. As long as you're consumed with your desire to live, even though we both know there is no way possible for you to do so, then I don't want to love you. Today you have shown me it could be fairly easy for me to grow to love you. Given the time, I can honestly say I'd be hopelessly in love with you." She spoke without expression, her energy suddenly gone from her body.

Trip leaned away from her, scratching the back of his head in surprise and confusion. Typical guy, didn't know what to say. So Jenna continued.

"What I didn't tell my aunt is this: I'm dead too. My body is at least. I still have the power to create dreamscapes and to go from one dreamscape to another. However, I can't go back to the tangible reality that everyone else knows. I'm dead, just like you're dead. The only people I'm alive to are you and my aunt. To everyone else, I'm stone cold and buried by now." Her voice wavered slightly but she bravely continued. "I was only able to embrace my friend once before an assassin finally succeeded in killing me."

She did pause then, closing her eyes for a moment to regain composure. "So you see, the only source of companionship offered to me is you. Did I ask for that, no. I was perfectly willing to live in a few dreamscapes for a few years then let my consciousness melt away until I was dead to all realities known. However, now you are here. I am responsible for your existence now, whether we like it or not. I can take you with me to other dreamscapes, I have that power, or I could leave you here on your own to live for all eternity. That's the thing with these dreamscapes; we don't age or grow sick. We have to choose to die and even then it's difficult to do so." She opened her eyes and looked at him again. "So you can understand a bit more now when I say I don't want to love someone who would happily reject me and our existence together for the chance to live again. I don't want to love you as long as you wish you were alive. With you doing that that would mean you would never truly enjoy loving me or being with me. You may think that totally unkind of me and maybe even say, 'don't you wish you were alive too?' No, actually I don't. I've lived in the tangible world once and I had to kill my husband. I would rather live here where I don't have to kill anyone."

Trip still didn't know what to say so Jenna turned and started down the corridor. Trip watched her walk with a mixture of confusion and fear. With this new information a lot about her made more sense to him. It also made it a bit easier for him to care for her as well. Knowing that she had no one but him…and that she'd chosen to give him a chance of sorts…well that made him really question himself. Truthfully, what did he have going for him back in the real life? Their mission was coming to an end and everyone was going to go their own way. He had planned on resigning from Starfleet to go back home, to what was left of it anyway, to live with his parents. What would he have done? Tinkered with mechanics and machines until maybe he got married and maybe had children. Was that so much to miss?

Trip shook himself from his thoughts and watched as the turbolift doors shut behind Jenna. Of course the typical guy side of him was screaming, "It was just a stupid kiss…or almost kiss," while the more logical—thanks T'Pol—knew and understood both her side and his side. They both had a point. She'd existed a lot longer in solitude than he had. She was more resigned to being dead than he was—she'd probably been dead longer than he. However was he going to let his past and now no longer a possibility, keep him from finding happiness in this new opportunity? Neither of them had asked for this; it'd been forced on them by well meaning friends and family. But was he really going to allow his resentment and self-pity keep him from pursuing a relationship with the complicatedly wonderful woman who just admitted to being quite vulnerable to him?

To his discredit, he stood there another five minutes before he made his decision. To his credit, he headed for Jenna's quarters. Their conversation was FAR from over.


	10. For your info the answer is always yes

Stupid, this was just bloody stupid! Why was she nearly in tears over that silly man? She hadn't had a man in decades and now here she was near tears because one man, just ONE man, asked her for a stupid kiss. Why did she have to be so stubborn? Why did she have to be so un-bending towards her own values and beliefs? Why couldn't she sell herself out for a meaningless encounter?

Jenna fumed as she continued to curse herself, her aunt, and Trip over and through hell. She was going to sit and cool off in her room then after she was done cooling off she would start creating another dreamscape. She needed some time and space away from Trip—that would be the most mentally and emotionally healthy move on her part. Jenna punched the wall of her quarters on her way in, relishing the pain that wracked through her knuckles from the harsh punishment done to them. Pain was welcome at this point. Anything that distracted her from her inner wants and desires that she now knew would never come to fruition.

She paced around her quarters, cursing in the few languages that she knew other than her mother tongue. She felt like a trapped…what was it the humans called it…LIONESS yes that was it! She felt like a trapped lioness. She needed to get out, to breathe, and to stretch but she couldn't. She was trapped in these dreamscapes with nothing and no one, except one person who didn't even want or appreciate being there. Jenna growled and punched the wall again and again, not even noticing when blood started spotting the wall.

Suddenly arms reached around her body and grabbed hold of her wrists, jerking her hands back to cover her chest. She growled and sputtered as she struggled against the body pressed against her back. One thing she really hated about this new body: her lack of strength. Her struggles did nothing to help release her; she only ended up getting pinned chest first to the wall, her arms held tight against her chest by her and his added body weight. She turned her head and glared at him over her shoulder.

"What the hell are you doing Trip? Can't you just leave well enough alone?"

Trip looked angry and confused at the same time, "Why in the hell were you hurting yourself like that?"

"What do you care?" she bit back at him. "I'm nothing but an accident to you anyways. Why can't you just leave me alone Trip? I don't want to see you; I don't want to even breathe the same air as you!"

Trip leaned closer, his anger still apparent, "Why? A few minutes ago you were telling me that you could easily fall in love with me and now you're basically telling me to talk a long walk off a short pier."

Jenna looked confused over his idiom but struggled against his arms again. She lashed out with her feet and bucked around with her hips and shoulders, snarling like a cornered animal as she did so. To his credit, Trip didn't hurt her as he held her pinned to the wall, even though it would've been very easy to do so. He was even smart enough not to turn her around to face him, because had he done so his nether regions would've been attacked within milliseconds.

"Jenna just stop it!" Trip growled over her snarls, leaning closer to keep more weight against her back.

A few moments later Jenna's movements stopped and Trip suddenly became worried at the complete stillness he felt from her. He pulled away to peer at her and was shocked to see tears starting to silently fall down her cheeks. Seconds after the initial shock of seeing her cry, he wasn't spared more when her whole body racked with sobs and he suddenly held one of the most violent weepers he'd ever seen in his life.

"Jenna," Trip loosened his grip on her and watched as she sunk down to the floor in the same position, "what's going on?" He followed her down and kneeled beside her sobbing form, wanting to reach out and touch her but not knowing what in the hell would happen if he did so.

Jenna didn't even bother wiping at her tears, "Why?"

"What do you mean?" For the life of him, Trip would NEVER understand woman and their very odd communication skills.

"Do you even care, Trip, or is it just the gentleman in you that made you stop me, that made you extend a hand of friendship to me?" She peered at him through teary eyes. "I know I shouldn't ask this question but if we had met in your life would you have given me a second glance? Would it have made a difference if we'd both been alive in your world instead of both dead in this one?" She smiled cynically, "Is that it Trip? Is it because we're dead? You feel that you must have some sort of purgatory to make up for the fact that you'll never be fully alive as you once knew?"

After she grew silent, her tears having slowed to a trickle, Trip scratched the back of his head, again not knowing what to say. However, he figured as long as he talked it would be better than leaving her with his silence—since that obviously hadn't worked so well earlier.

"Jenna, I honestly don't think I would've passed you over in my life. You're much too much of a personality to be reckoned with to ignore, tell you the truth." He smiled at her but stopped when he saw his words didn't even make her lips twitch upwards. "And I'd like to think that I genuinely have wanted to become your friend. I'm coming to terms with my death, Jenna, I'm new at this you know, and I think once I realized that this was it, I decided to commit myself to this, whatever it is."

Jenna finally wiped her sleeve across her face, "What do you mean?"

"I mean I don't want you to leave me." Trip looked very vulnerable then and tried to avoid eye contact as he sheepishly continued. "I know you have the power to create another dreamscape and leave me here, and it isn't even the fact that you'd leave me here alone, well that is a small part of it, I mean-" Trip took a deep breath and slowly let it out before continuing. "Jenna I want to know you. I've said some of the most horrible things I've ever said to a woman before to you, and you never deserved one bit of it. I've mistreated you, I've taken you for granted, and I've overlooked your own feelings. I've been a cad and where I come from cads are good-for-nothings that deserve a good walloping."

"A what?" Jenna looked confused, but there was also something else in her eyes, something he couldn't put his finger on…and it was that that he focused on to continue.

"It doesn't matter. What matters is this: we started out wrong, I tried to smooth things over in the wrong fashion, and now we're here. We could continue to let things go wrong by me letting you leave in another dreamscape and you continuing to think I'm the biggest scum to ever exist, which at this moment isn't too far from the truth." Jenna did chuckle at that and Trip finally reached out to touch the top of her head, very gently, almost as if the touch would break her. "Or we could start over. We obviously have the time to you know." Again Jenna chuckled and Trip's touch grew bolder. "I could ask about your life, your feelings, and I could listen while you told me. We could discover common and dissimilar interests together. I could teach you more dances and you could more than likely teach me something that I don't know as well." Trip smoothed his hand down her head until it cupped the back of her neck.

Jenna swallowed against the lump in her throat, weighing his words before speaking again. "You really mean all that don't you?"

Trip nodded, a soft smile on his lips. Jenna nodded in return, nibbling her lower lip as she thought. There was no harm in his suggestion. It wasn't like they had other places to be, other people to see. They in fact only had each other. Strange how when thrust together two strangers can suddenly be willing to form a relationship for the sole purpose of no longer being alone. However, Jenna honestly felt that there was something more than just that in her budding relationship with Trip. Maybe she was foolishly hoping for such a thing, or maybe it was really there. Either way, they would figure it out sooner or later. They had the rest of, well, they had a long time to figure out a lot of things.

"Trip."

He tipped his head to the side, his fingers still playing with the hair at her neck, "Yes?"

"May I kiss you?"

He smiled and so did Jenna. He nodded and she reached forward, placing her hands on either side of his face. She traced her fingertips across his cheeks, watching as his features softened from the touch. She leaned forward and placed her forehead against his, breathing in deeply the exotic scent of Trip, relishing the fact that she no longer had to loathe it and the temptation it gave her. Her left hand buried itself in his thick hair and she couldn't help but sigh in satisfaction at the lush feel it had moving past her roaming fingers.

She felt his hands move to cup her face, his own fingers rubbing against her face. Her entire being warmed considerably, her heart finding a bit of peace after the years of loneliness. She knew that no matter what came of their relationship she need no longer fear loneliness or solitude—as she had tried to convince herself that she had never been for years before.

"You ever going to kiss me?" He drawled, a smile playing at his lips.

Jenna clicked her tongue at him, "All good things happen with time," she kissed the tip of his nose playfully, "and I'm taking my time." She proceeded to slowly kiss his cheek, his jawline, his forehead, his chin, his eyes, and his ear.

"I gather that." His eyes were closed but his lips were curved into lazy smile. "I'm all for it actually."

Jenna chuckled once more before she pressed her lips gently against his, the kiss warm and sweet but unhurried. When she drew away finally they were both smiling. It felt so damn good to kiss again! She'd forgotten what it felt like really, and that was just the tip of the iceberg in regards to kissing.

"May I kiss you?" He asked playfully, his fingers brushing the hair out of her face.

Jenna grinned, "You never need to ask me again. The answer is always yes."

"That's good to know." Trip commented huskily as he leaned in again.


End file.
